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THE FAKE NEWS (EE#18)
An e-zine for Norm Macdonald fans
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[ FROM THE EDITOR ]
Greetings, all. This issue didn't roll out last week due to lack
of Norm news. But, hey, looks like there's a little bit of
noteworthy stuff to share now.
But first, I need some volunteers to transcribe these
appearances: The View (9/29), Regis & Kathie Lee (9/22)
and The Late Show (9/21). I'd also like to add the recent
"Details" article to the archive. Please email me before
beginning work. I'm feeling generous. Hint, hint.
Your continued support is appreciated. Have a safe and
happy Thanksgiving holiday. -N!
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o Donate 10 CENTS to The Fake News with a click!
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[ NEWS ]
Nov. 22 (USA Today) -- Legendary comedian RICHARD
PRYOR will make a rare TV appearance in the Dec. 1
episode of "Norm" ("Norm vs. the Boxer"), poking fun at
his multiple sclerosis. In anng gag, Pryor jumps out of
his wheelchair -- with the help of a stunt double -- and
attacks Our Hero, whose back is turned. Norm accuses
Pryor's character of faking his disability (''You're not really
a cripple!''), then drops him to the ground, hitting his head.
The injured comic's response: ''I'm a rich cripple.'' Pryor
liked Macdonald's work from SNL, so "Norm" producers
invited him to appear. ''We were surprised and happy he
went for it,'' says co-creator BRUCE "THE GENIUS"
HELFORD. In 1996, Pryor received an Emmy nomination
for his guest role in "Chicago Hope" as an MS patient who
retained his sense of humor under difficult circumstances.
Previous cold-sequence guests: DENNIS MILLER,
TOM ARNOLD, POKEMON critters, the DEVIL and some
other folks we forgot.
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Nov. 17 (Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo) -- Bit parts a plenty
for Norm. Not only is Our Hero supposed to make an
appearance in "Man on the Moon," but it seems he'll also get
some screen time in "Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo" (as if
there were such a thing as a female gigolo.) It's an ADAM
SANDLER-produced comedy due in theaters December
10th. A fish aquarium cleaner (ROB SCHNEIDER) house
sits for a client who is a man whore (ODED FEHR, "The
Mummy"). One wacky mishap later -- Deuce makes a $6,000
mess and needs to clean it up -- he ends up going out on
calls, so a guy who could never get the girl is now getting
paid to have dirty, dirty sex. You've seen this before: Think
DAN AYKROYD's "Fred Garvin: Male Prostitute" meets
1989's "Loverboy" in which a Senor Pizza delivery boy
turns tricks. Anyway, back to Norm ... it seems he'll be
playing a bartender in a scene that somehow has him say to
Schneider, "Perhaps you misunderstood me. If you don't
pay the money, I'm gonna take this swizzle stick here, and
I'll be shoving that up your peehole." Sounds like Oscars all
around to us.
o Listen to Norm threaten Schneider.
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/a/deuce.ram
o "Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo" website.
http://www.deucethegigolo.com
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Read more NEWS ...
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/news.shtml
[ APPEARANCES ]
None as of presstime.
[ NORM ]
This week ... Episode 20: "Norm vs. Denby" -- When Mr.
Denby breaks up with his wife, Laurie encourages Norm to
take his despondent boss under his wing. But the two men
find themselves at odds when they discover that they are
vying for the affections of the same woman. Meanwhile,
kind-hearted Laurie is confronted by the one person from her
past she treated with disrespect.
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Next week ... Episode 21: "Norm vs. the Boxer" -- Deep in
debt after his gambling run, Norm finds a kid who he thinks
is a boxing phenom and persuades Danny to bankroll his
training. All goes well until Norm discovers the kid is not
what he seems. RICHARD PRYOR makes a special cameo
appearance.
--
ABC has narrowed the field in the "Dream Date with Norm"
contest to nine lucky ladies. Visit the official "Norm" site to
vote for your favorite contestant.
o You be the judge ...
http://www.abc.go.com/primetime/norm/date/rules1.html
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"Norm" tapings are scheduled for December 3, 10 and 17.
As of presstime, tickets were still available for each date. If
you're going to be in the Burbank area, visit our friends at
AUI and snag some free tickets:
o Audiences Unlimited, Inc.
http://www.tvtickets.com
[ ARCHIVE ]
Ah, "Dirty Work," the second greatest skinny guy/fat
guy-buddy picture ever filmed in Toronto, Ontario, Canada
(The first being "Tommy Boy.") Not all of FRANK
SEBASTIANO, FRED WOLF and Norm's genius made it
from script to screen. We've safely preserved these lost
scenes in our archive for the ages.
o "Dirty Work": The Lost Scenes
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/lost.shtml
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Explore our extensive ARCHIVE ...
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/archive.shtml
[ VIDEOS ]
For a limited time, with a $15 contribution toward the
maintenance of The Fake News, you can receive a thank you
gift of one of our quirky Norm videos!
o Info on the Norm Video offer.
mailto:editor?subject=Videos
[ LAUGHS ]
"JUDGE ITO was interviewed this week, by a local TV
station in Los Angeles. Asked by the interviewer if it was
appropriate for a supposedly impartial judge to be on TV
with his case still pending, Ito said, 'Maybe not, but how
appropriate is it to kill your ex-wife?' "
--
"Well there may be trouble in paradise, LISA MARIE
PRESLEY confirmed this week. that she and MICHAEL
JACKSON live in separate residences, 50 miles away from
each other. Lisa Marie was quoted as saying 'I guess being
married to a homosexual pedophile wasn't such a great idea
after all.' "
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The Howard Stern Show as Bob Dole: "Well, with age
brings wisdom. Unless you're RONALD REAGAN. Then it
brings Alzheimer's. That character. I went over to visit
Reagan last month at his ranch. Nancy said he was out back
riding horses and chopping wood. I go back to see him, and
find him riding wood and chopping horses! ... the polar
opposite, but seriously, Stern. Last week, I got a Mothers
Day card from the jack off. "
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Check out more LAUGHS ...
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/laughs.shtml
[ CONTEST ]
The 25th Caption Contest winner is ... TOM TUCCI!!! The
next round is already underway. It's going to be an
especially long one, as we're tripling the prize to celebrate
our 2nd anniversary. So, get your entries in by the January
6th deadline and win all three of our crappy, yet remarkably
cool Norm videos.
o Check out Tom Tucci's caption.
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/winner25.shtml
o Test your wit in the current contest.
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/contest.shtml
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THE FAKE NEWS
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mailto:editor
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