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THE WINNER
"Regis shows Norm what it takes to be in porn flicks."
Dan Berns
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TOO GOOD NOT TO SHARE
"Go ahead with your story, Norm. I'm just pretending I'm knitting."
Mike Bass
Pictured from right to left: Norm Macdonald, Crack Whore and Assistant Crack Whore
Ben Bowman
"Whooa, Dolly! I don't think I should've drank all that prune juice for breakfast!"
Jim Clare
While Norm distracts Regis and Kathie Lee with a few funny jokes, the notoriously perverse Fox 4 logo sneaks a peek up
Kathie Lee's skirt.
Brandon Cooksey
As Norm looks on in silent astonishment, Regis reveals his adulterous affair with Kathie Lee to all in vivid detail.
Stephen Dubien
"I was well on my way to being the world's finest accordion player, when one night, of all the accordion bars in the
world, she had to walk into mine ... "
Christine James
"Sometimes, when I know that nobody's looking at me, I like to stare at pretty girls and pretend that they're pirates.
But, I always get funny looks when I giggle, because I just imagined them going, 'Arrrrr, where be my booty?' But what
else would you expect from me, Regis Philbin?"
Brent Kinkade
Their eyes met and they could do little to contain their animal emotions, the passion they felt ready to burst
forth at any moment. Both were allegedly married, but that was becoming more of a trivial detail as each agonizing
sexually-charged second ticked by. Regis, however, noticed none of this, as he was deeply engrossed in the story of
his recent prostate exam.
Ryan Kreis
Regis shows Norm the exact size of the cotton wad needed to shut Kathie Lee up.
Stephen Murray
"Dear lord, Regis, will you please stop talking about Kathie Lee's breasts!?!"
Pokey
Regis explains his desire to take Norm's fuzzy head and rub it between his "man-breasts," while Kathie Lee nods
in agreement.
Puddlesky
"Thank you for the shirt and pants, Kath. Now, when I go to the Emmys and Joan Rivers asks me who made my outfit,
I can tell her, 'Three hundred screaming Korean children.' "
Steve Rees
"Sorry Regis, you're out. Simon said stare seductively into my eyes while crossing your legs like a fairy and playing
with your hair. NOT stare seductively into my eyes while crossing your legs like a fairy and showing me your 'girth'!"
Jimmy Robinson
"Yes Regis, that big!"
Joe Ryan
"The prostitute's breasts were the size of watermelons, Norm!"
Josh Yborra
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