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THE FAKE NEWS (EE#29)
An e-zine for Norm Macdonald fans
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[ FROM THE EDITOR ]
My fellow Norm fans,
I hope none of you made any special plans for tonight (Oct. 4) or, if you
have, that you've figured out how to program your VCR. Why? Tonight on
ABC is the SERIES PREMIERE OF "NORM"! So for those of you who have been
dying for a much needed fix of Our Hero, tune in to the alphabet network
at at 9:30/8:30c for 'Norm vs. the Sacrifice' (episode information
provided in "Norm" section of newsletter).
But, that's not all. Tonight, Norm will be making a guest appearance
on "The Tonight Show with King Chin (oops...I mean JAY LENO)." We would
have preferred Our Hero promoting his show on Conan, Letterman, or even
BILL MAHER, but we'll take what we can get.
Fake News is Good News,
Mike Weiss
[ NEWS ]
Oct. 4 (ToggleThis Cartoon) -- The alphabet network is always coming up
with new and interesting ways to promote its shows. Recently, ABC teamed
up with TOGGLETHIS (an e-mail marketing and multimedia design company) and
created an Interactive "Norm" cartoon. The cartoon, entitled "Castaway
Norm" lets your click and drag Our Hero on your computer desktop. The
cartoon also features a game called "Castaway Keep Away" in which you try
to keep a piece of food (a "rat-kabob" to be specific) away from Norm and
Wiener Dog. So, if you have Windows 95, 98, 2000 or NT 4.0, head to the
ToggleThis website to receive your free "Normtoon" and a chance to win a
61'' Big Screen TV!
o ToggleThis "Normtoon"
http://www.togglethis.com/dl/index_nm.php3?character=norm
--
Oct. 4 (The National Enquirer) -- Whenever a celebrity reemerges in the
public eye, there's bound to be a tabloid story chasing his or her tail.
America's most reliable news source AKA The National Enquirer recently
reported on a scuffle which Our Hero was allegedly involved in. NE said
"[While] enjoying a mellow evening at the club's [Improv's] bar, Norm was
suddenly jolted by the cry: "THERE'S A FIGHT ACROSS THE STREET!" When told
a pal was getting his bells rung, the star rushed outside -- and saw a
comedy writer buddy getting shoved and screamed at by some no-name comic.
Norm, playing peacemaker, put his hand on Bully Boy's shoulder and . . .
Cr-r-AACK!! The guy hauled off and slapped himanded -- right across
the face!" Remember the motto of The Nation Enquirer: Our stories have at
most a 50:50 chance of being true.
o Norm Macdonald Gets Punch Line Right in the Kisser
http://nationalenquirer.com/breakingnews/breakingnews.cfm?instanceid=680
--
Sept. 1 (Norm) -- What do JOHN WAYNE BOBBIT, COURTNEY THORNE-SMITH, and
RICK ROCKWELL have in common? Try not to think too perversely on this
one. Word is that all three will make guest appearances on upcoming
episodes of "Norm." Former "Ally McBeal" and "Melrose Place" babe
Courtney Thorne-Smith will portray a lesbian with whom Our Hero will try
to date. Former porn star John Wayne Bobbit will play a husband
rebounding from a broken marriage on the October 6th episode. "And his
penis will be portrayed by none other than PAULY SHORE." Rockwell will
guest star as himself.
[ NORM ]
This week ...
(Wednesday 9:30) -- Episode 31: "Norm vs. the Sacrifice" -- SPECIAL
PREVIEW EPISODE - Mr. Denby decides to take control of the office and
demands respect from Norm and the gang. If Norm’s attitude doesn't change,
Denby threatens to make everyone’s life miserable. Meanwhile, Laurie is
dating a soap star (Ian Buchanan, "One Life to Live") who can’t
differentiate between his character and his own persona. .
(Friday 9:00) -- Episode 32: "Secret Crush" -- Shelly (Faith Ford) comes
back into Norm's life just as he is trying to determine who his 'secret
admirer' is. Meanwhile, Danny makes plans to propose to Taylor and Denby
is forced to share a workspace with the rest of his staff.
Multi-millionaire marrying man Rick Rockwell appears as himself.
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Next week ...
(Friday 9:00) -- Episode 33: "Taylor Leaves" -- Taylor has doubts about
Danny when her love for another man (we'd rather you be surprised, so we
won't reveal who) gets in the way; Norm gets a lawyer. As the tile
suggests this episode will mark the final appearance of THE AMAZING
BREASTS OF NIKKI COX. So be sure to watch this episode with a box of
tissues nearby (which can, of course, be used for drying things other than
tears).
--
"Norm" tapings are scheduled for October 13, October 20, and November 3 at
7:00 PM. As of presstime, tickets were still available for all dates. If
you're going to be in the Burbank area, visit our friends at AUI and snag
some free tickets:
o Audiences Unlimited, Inc.: "Norm"
http://www.tvtickets.com
[ APPEARANCES ]
o Tonight Show on Oct. 4 (NBC)
o Late Night rerun on Oct. 6 (NBC).
[ CONTEST ]
The 32nd Caption Contest winner is ... TOTAL PEST!!! The 33rd Caption
Contest winner is ... RON JEREMY!!! The next round is already underway.
Get your entries in by the October 31st deadline and win a year's supply
of Pencil Shavings! Well, what were you expecting?
o Check out Total Pest's caption.
http://thefakenews.net/n/winner32.shtml
o Check out Ron Jeremy's caption.
http://thefakenews.net/n/winner33.shtml
o Test your wit in the current contest.
http://www.thefakenews.net/n/contest.shtml
[ COMPUTERMIKE.COM ]
ComputerMike.com, parent company of The Fake News, is currently spinning
off (giving away) some of it's discontinued sites. So, if you have a web
site and would like to take over any of the following sites, please
contact me at webmaster
o The Dana Carvey Site
http://computermike.com/dana
o The South Park Resort
http://computermike.com/south
o Jim Breuer Headquarters
http://computermike.com/jim
o Kightlingerland
http://computermike.com/laura
o R.E.M. The Shinny Happy Website
http://computermike.com/rem
o Goat World
http://computermike.com/goats
That's all for this issue, fellow Norm fans. Continue to support The Fake
News by clicking on the ad banners. Remember, every click makes a
difference...or something like that.
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THE FAKE NEWS
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mailto:editor
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