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 Details magazine writer Michael Kaplan sat in for a 6-hour, after-midnight poker session with Norm and pals (after a night of work on his debut comedy CD). Along the way, Our Hero talked about his rather expensive hobby, "People think of [gambling] as a sickness. But it is the only sickness where you can potentially win huge sums of money." And he does win. Once he won $50,000 at blackjack, and another time he ran a slim bankroll up to $80,000 at the craps table. He also loses. Last football season, he lost tens of thousands of dollars, but eventually hit it big and was due almost $100,000 -- only to have his bookie skip town. "The problem with gambling is that it's much more interesting than anything else," Norm says. "A lot of times at 'Saturday Night Live,' I'd be thinking about gambling instead of the show. I lost all my money and more. But when you gamble a lot, there is nothing else that you really feel like doing anyway. ... I probably wouldn't gamble much if I cleaned toilets for a living. [Showbiz money] is easy money, and you feel kind of guilty for having it anyway." The article is a unique look at Norm's after hours life. Check the November issue of Details.
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Our Hero |
Our Hero pretty much said it all, "When the people here asked me to do the show, I've got to say, I felt kind of weird. I don't know if you remember this, but I actually used to be on this show. ... A year and a half ago, I had sort of a disagreement with the management at NBC. I wanted to keep my job. Right? And they felt the exact opposite. They fired me because they said that I wasn't funny. Now, with most jobs, I could have had a hell of a lawsuit on my hands for that, but see, this is a comedy show. So, they got me. But, now, this is the weird part, it's only a year and a half later, and now, they ask me to host the show. ... How did I go from being not funny enough to be even allowed in the building, to being so funny that I'm now hosting the show? How did I suddenly get so goddamn funny?! ... Then it occurred to me, I haven't gotten funnier, the show has gotten really bad! So, yeah, I'm funny compared to, you know, you'll see later. OK, so let's recap, the bad news is: I'm still not funny. The good news is: The show blows!" (Listen to Norm's entire monologue.) We're rather biased, but it had to be one of the betterng monologues of recent memory. As for the sketches, well, he delivered a lot more than he promised. Fans were treated to reprises of his Burt Reynolds and Larry King impersonations. There was a pretty unstable bit with him in a toothbrush costume. But we won't dwell on that. He also played a bartender to a Michael Jackson (Tim Meadows) looking to drown his marital sorrows (Tim actually poked a little fun at Norm by stumbling to find his words, "So, I says to her, I says, I says." Pretty funny.) Probably, the most brilliant sketch of the night was a parody of "Inside the Actors Studio" in which Norm rolled out a very subtle Clint Eastwood impression. But, the real star of the bit was Will Ferrell as the show's "colorful" host James Lipton. The most disappointing thing about the evening, was Norm's lack of involvement in "Weekend Update." A real missed opportunity there. A notable no show during the broadcast was Chris Kattan. Maybe it was in protest? Oh, Norm said "goddamn" about three times during the show, we're told the no-nos were censored on some west coast affiliates. Check out photos from Our Hero's triumphant return to "Saturday Night Live."
Rest assured, "Norm" won't be canceled any time soon. ABC has committed to a full season Norm's comedy series by supplementing its original 13-episode order with a "back nine" order.
Saints be praised! ABC suits be praised! Oh, wait, maybe that's a bit hasty. USA Today's Gary Levin reports "Norm" will shift back to Wednesdays at 9:30 ET/PT next month in a move that may well become permanent. Current 9:30 occupant "Oh Grow Up" will be pre-empted. It looks like the alphabet network read the handwriting on the wall just as well as we did.
You have to wonder why NBC's been so tight-lipped about Norm hosting SNL (Oct. 23), but it's true ... as it was finally announced during tonight's broadcast. Musical guests are Dr. Dre with Snoop Dog and Eminem. With Our Hero in New York, there's a good chance of some short-notice talk show appearances. Most likely Howard Stern and Conan O'Brien.
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Will Regis kill "Norm"? |
"Norm" slips for the third week in the critical Nielsen rankings. The sitcom posted its lowest ratings EVER with "Norm vs. Death," with only 6.3 million viewers dialed into ABC. The show has dipped each week since it's premiere, which drew 7.8 million viewers. The freshman season of "Norm" averaged 8.3 million viewers each week. The second episode being the all-time high with almost 10 million. But then, it kept the majority of viewers who'd just watched "The Drew Carey Show." Since the new pairing with "Two Guys and a Girl" -- before "Drew" -- the magical gel of audiences just hasn't been there. The show squatting in the post-"Drew" slot, "Oh Grow Up," isn't performing to expectation -- unable to rate as well as "Norm" and "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" did last season. It seems if Our Hero's sitcom is going to see the 8 million viewer mark again, it'll have to be with a schedule change of some sort ... we think that's a return to its old timeslot. And things are going to get worse, with November sweeps just around the corner, ABC plans to pre-empt "Norm" in favor of "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" (Nov. 10, 17)
Last week, we received an email from a reader who recently screened "Foolproof." A few days later, Ain't It Cool News published a similar reader review. Both are decidedly negative. Both contain spoilers, so don't read any further if you can't deal. Oh, for those who arrived to class late, "Foolproof" was originally scheduled to premiere next month, but has been delayed indefinitely by Universal Pictures:
As a loyal Norm devotee and huge fan of thefakenews.net, I feel you should be the first to know that Our Hero Norm is about to drop a huge bomb on the American viewing public. That bomb has a name and it's called "Foolproof." Yes, that's right, from the comedic talents who brought you not only "Problem Child," but "Problem Child 2," comes Our Hero's next and hopefully last movie, "Foolproof." I attended a screening this weekend and my lord, 90 minutes have never lasted longer. The film follows Norm as a butler who doesn't get any respect from his withered old employer. So, what else would any American do? They'd seek revenge. So, he and Dave Chappelle steal this old bag's pooch, and leave a ransom note for $1,000,000. But the kidnapping goes wrong and, ala "There's Something About Mary," the dog is insane. He bites Norm's hand, spraying blood all over the place, and then to top all of that off the duo lose the dog when they leave the house. Flash to morning and the woman, please forgive me I cant remember her name or character name, sees the blood splattered around her mansion and assumes that Willard (Norm) has been kidnapped. Wackiness and hijinks ensue as Dave and Norm try to make the public believe he was kidnapped. This goes on for what seems like hours. I personally loved "Dirty Work," but I absolutely despise this film. It was unfunny, paced like a snail, and was so bad I wanted my money back, but knew I couldn't get it because it was a free screening. But who knows, it's only October, and the movie doesn't come out till spring. I'm praying they do something about this awful piece of cinematic trash. BAKED SPAM
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Ohlmeyer (left) and Michaels |
It sounds too good to be true. The New York Post's Michael Starr reports that Norm will host the October 23 edition of "Saturday Night Live." If true, it would be his first featured appearance since January 1998 when he was removed from the "Weekend Update" anchor desk in mid-season and without notice by then NBC West Coast President Don Ohlmeyer. Ohlmeyer, a close friend of O.J. Simpson, never said publicly why he objected to Macdonald -- but the comic's anti-O.J. jokes reportedly played a role. He publicly denied that was the reason. Norm was kept as a cast member for awhile, but was unhappy and asked to be let out of his NBC contract. His request was granted. Weeks later, Ohlmeyer declined to let NBC take TV ads promoting "Dirty Work" -- a ban he was later forced to lift by his superior. Ohlmeyer eventually left NBC. Starr's unnamed insider says Norm was asked to host "SNL" by the show's executive producer, Lorne Michaels. No official word has been given by NBC and Norm's reps failed to return several calls from The Post. We're somewhat leery of getting our hopes up, as the sensational New York tabloid isn't a source we readily trust. But it's an honor Norm richly deserves.
EDITOR'S NOTE (Oct. 4): The Washington Post published the Oct. 23 date, but said NBC won't confirm that Norm has been invited to host. Their sources say the network is working out scheduling details with the actor and Warner Bros., which produces his sitcom.
EDITOR'S NOTE (Oct. 11): "SNL" cast member Jimmy Fallon told a SATURDAY-NIGHT-LIVE.com reader at a book signing last week that Norm's return is definite.
EDITOR'S NOTE (Oct. 16): It's official. See October 16 entry.
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